Well, I got in exactly two training runs the week of 12/4 before I quit marathon training again. In some ways, my lack of perseverance is disheartening, but to be completely honest, I just don't feel guilty about packing it in again. My motivation is just not there right now. I had to push myself out the door for those first two training runs. It was all I could do just to get through them. This is just not how I used to be while training. Something is obviously not right with me right now nor has it been since Nashville back in April.
I have thought a great deal about why I'm not motivated to run and why all of my old enthusiasm for running seems to have evaporated (at least temporarily). I have not come up with a definitive answer, but I do have some thoughts that at least begin to make sense to me.
One thing that I'm relatively certain about is that I have become a "marathon snob". This is not a moniker that I came up with myself, but heard or read somewhere. At this point, I just have it in my head that any race shorter than a marathon is just not worth the time and energy it takes to prepare. Don't get me wrong; I realize that my times at shorter distances are far from impressive and could be improved upon substantially, but I just don't care to make the effort. If I'm not training to run the full 26.2, I just can't be bothered it seems. I guess that I have always been geared that way when it comes to doing anything. It's either all or nothing. Marathoning to me represents the all, and any other race represents the nothing. This is completely a mental/psychological thing, and I'm obviously aware of it at this point, but I just can't seem to or don't want to get past it at the current time. Will that change down the road? Who knows? I hope that it will.
Something else that I have become aware of that is related to the whole "marathon snob" syndrome is that over the past few years I have put a lot of pressure on myself to train for marathons, complete them, and hopefully run a PR in the process. I suppose that after the Country Music Marathon (where my performance was not good), all that pressure in combination with my disappointment at my performance just came to a head and snuffed out my motivation. Over the last couple of years of training for and running marathons, the marathon itself was my reward for 16 - 18 weeks of hard training. In this manner, the marathon (and my performance in the race) served as motivation during my training for that race and the next one after (where I would look to improve). I knew that if I didn't prepare properly, I wouldn't perform well and may not finish the race. The fear of failure and/or poor performance motivated me to get my butt out the door and train. Now, the unfortunate thing is that I really don't feel compelled to run any particular marathon so the race itself can't serve as motivation for my training. Without that motivation to train, why bother? Like I said earlier, it's pretty much all or nothing for me with most things. If I'm not going to run 30+ miles and do speed work, tempo runs, and the whole bit, why run at all? I have found that when I do go out and run now, I really haven't been enjoying it like I did in the past. Something just seems to be missing.
What is the answer to all of this? I'll be damned if I know, but I have put some pretty serious thought into it. One thing that I think I need to do is to get back to basics with my running and working out. I need to put away the HR monitor and the GPS unit and forget about pace per mile, tempo runs, etc. I need to get back to the pure and simple experience of running. I need to have my running served raw or rare as opposed to the marinated, julienne-cut, sauteed, and garnished version that became the norm over the last few years. If I don't enjoy running for what it has always meant to me in the past (a perfect harmony between myself and the outdoors while getting me and keeping me in shape), then I'll never stick with it over the long haul.
I also need to re-evaluate the goals and expectations that I set for myself. Over the last couple of years, my goals have gradually but continually been ratcheted up to the point where standing on the ground and looking up at them now is pretty intimidating. I need to start fresh and establish some basic goals for myself. I need to get myself back into a regular habit of running and working out before attempting anything too ambitious. I have tried to jump from barely running at all right back into intense marathon training with no period of adjustment in between. It is just too overwhelming at this point. It's almost like I know from the outset that I'm going to fall short so I immediatey resign myself to failure and give up.
I guess that this time is the right time of year to be looking inward and setting new goals for myself since the new year is right around the corner. I won't call the new goals that I set "resolutions" because the New Year's resolutions that people make generally don't last for more than a month or two. I really want to take a long look at where I am now and where I want to be and then chart myself a realistic course to get there.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
First Training Run
...and boy was it a cold one. What a difference a week (not even quite) can make! I went running last Thursday (four short days ago) in shorts and short-sleeves and actually felt hot 4 miles into my run. The temperature was close to 70 degrees. On Monday night, the temperature was a balmy 28 degrees with an even lower windchill. This feels cold enough under normal circumstances, but it feels even colder when your body is not accustomed to the cold. It really shocks the system. The cold air hitting me when I opened the door really made me want to pass on going out to run and curl up on the sofa under a nice warm blanket.
Added to that was the fact that last night was my first night on 3rd shift since June and that I only got 6 hours of sleep. I had to stay over in the morning to conduct an interview and I didn't get home until 9:00am when I generally get home closer to 7:00am. I got into bed at 9:30am and had the alarm set for 3:30pm. When the alarm went off I must have been in a dead sleep because I was completely disoriented. I didn't know what day it was at first and what time of day it was(night or day). It took me the entire walk across the room to the alarm clock to figure out that it was Monday afternoon and that I had worked 3rd the night before...weird. Anyway, as you can imagine, it took me quite a while to be completely coherent. I really was going to bag the run for the night and push it back to Tuesday, but I got to reading some old posts from a message board where we used to post running related mesages and it inspired me to brave the cold and start my marathon training in style. It's amazing sometimes what difference a little motivation or inspiration can make. It truly can be the difference between spending half of your life on the couch getting fat or getting outside and doing something healthy for yourself.
I did a 3-mile tempo run and actually felt half decent on the run although {brrr} it was cold. I could hardly feel my feet for about the first mile and a half. By the 2-mile mark though, I was warm and toasty. It does feel good now to have gotten a run in first thing for the week. My plan now is to go to the track on Wednesday to do
my 8 x 400m repeats. Good start so far. Now I just need to keep the momentum going.
Added to that was the fact that last night was my first night on 3rd shift since June and that I only got 6 hours of sleep. I had to stay over in the morning to conduct an interview and I didn't get home until 9:00am when I generally get home closer to 7:00am. I got into bed at 9:30am and had the alarm set for 3:30pm. When the alarm went off I must have been in a dead sleep because I was completely disoriented. I didn't know what day it was at first and what time of day it was(night or day). It took me the entire walk across the room to the alarm clock to figure out that it was Monday afternoon and that I had worked 3rd the night before...weird. Anyway, as you can imagine, it took me quite a while to be completely coherent. I really was going to bag the run for the night and push it back to Tuesday, but I got to reading some old posts from a message board where we used to post running related mesages and it inspired me to brave the cold and start my marathon training in style. It's amazing sometimes what difference a little motivation or inspiration can make. It truly can be the difference between spending half of your life on the couch getting fat or getting outside and doing something healthy for yourself.
I did a 3-mile tempo run and actually felt half decent on the run although {brrr} it was cold. I could hardly feel my feet for about the first mile and a half. By the 2-mile mark though, I was warm and toasty. It does feel good now to have gotten a run in first thing for the week. My plan now is to go to the track on Wednesday to do
my 8 x 400m repeats. Good start so far. Now I just need to keep the momentum going.
Plans for the Spring
This week I will embark on preparations for the spring. I am
planning to run the Ocean Drive Marathon in NJ on 3/27/07.
http://www.odmarathon.org/
It's a point-to-point course that begins in historic Cape May, NJ
and travels up the coast to conclude in Sea Isle City, NJ. The race
travels through most of the NJ shore point destinations many of us
grew up visiting including Wildwood, Stone Harbor, and Avalon (where
Joe Paterno has a summer home).
It sounds like an interesting race. Crowd support is sporadic, but
I will have my iPod to keep me going. My only concern is the wind
(it's the beach in March), but from what I've read on
marathonguide.com, the last few years haven't been too bad. It will
give me my 6th state toward my very long-term (probably lifelong)
goal of running all 50 states.
The positive aspects of the marathon timing are that it's early in
the spring marathon season so unseasonably warm weather isn't much
of a concern. It might be really cold, but after training in the
Northeast all winter, I can handle that better than the warm and
humid conditions which have hurt me a few times. It will also give
me a chance to run a second spring marathon if I feel recovered
enough and am so inclined.
I am going to use the FIRST training program again where I will run
three times a week (for 16 weeks) performing a speed session, a
tempo run, and of course the omnipresent long run each week. This
program worked really well for me in the Fall of 2005 when I ran two
consecutive marathon PRs two weeks apart + a half-marathon PR. The
runs are varied and challenging, while the three days a week
schedule allows me the recovery time that I need. I already have
time goals in mind which I am using to set my training paces, but I
want to see how training progresses before making them public.
After being barely active for the last several months and gaining 10
pounds, I might not even make it to the starting line healthy enough
to run. I hope that this is not the case, but a great deal can
happen to your body when you put it through 16 weeks of intense
training. This is especially true when you have been slacking for
an extended period of time.
I am looking forward to the start of training. Well, I'm anxious,
maybe looking forward isn't the right way to phrase it. I'm a
little nervous about the demands of training with the way that work
has been for the past several months. The hours have been long and
the stress levels high. Running in the winter is also not my
favorite. Does anyone like it all that much? But I know that the
winter training is a necessary evil as it will harden me and
condition me well for the task I will face in March.
planning to run the Ocean Drive Marathon in NJ on 3/27/07.
http://www.odmarathon.org/
It's a point-to-point course that begins in historic Cape May, NJ
and travels up the coast to conclude in Sea Isle City, NJ. The race
travels through most of the NJ shore point destinations many of us
grew up visiting including Wildwood, Stone Harbor, and Avalon (where
Joe Paterno has a summer home).
It sounds like an interesting race. Crowd support is sporadic, but
I will have my iPod to keep me going. My only concern is the wind
(it's the beach in March), but from what I've read on
marathonguide.com, the last few years haven't been too bad. It will
give me my 6th state toward my very long-term (probably lifelong)
goal of running all 50 states.
The positive aspects of the marathon timing are that it's early in
the spring marathon season so unseasonably warm weather isn't much
of a concern. It might be really cold, but after training in the
Northeast all winter, I can handle that better than the warm and
humid conditions which have hurt me a few times. It will also give
me a chance to run a second spring marathon if I feel recovered
enough and am so inclined.
I am going to use the FIRST training program again where I will run
three times a week (for 16 weeks) performing a speed session, a
tempo run, and of course the omnipresent long run each week. This
program worked really well for me in the Fall of 2005 when I ran two
consecutive marathon PRs two weeks apart + a half-marathon PR. The
runs are varied and challenging, while the three days a week
schedule allows me the recovery time that I need. I already have
time goals in mind which I am using to set my training paces, but I
want to see how training progresses before making them public.
After being barely active for the last several months and gaining 10
pounds, I might not even make it to the starting line healthy enough
to run. I hope that this is not the case, but a great deal can
happen to your body when you put it through 16 weeks of intense
training. This is especially true when you have been slacking for
an extended period of time.
I am looking forward to the start of training. Well, I'm anxious,
maybe looking forward isn't the right way to phrase it. I'm a
little nervous about the demands of training with the way that work
has been for the past several months. The hours have been long and
the stress levels high. Running in the winter is also not my
favorite. Does anyone like it all that much? But I know that the
winter training is a necessary evil as it will harden me and
condition me well for the task I will face in March.
Friday, November 24, 2006
Gettysburg Trip
Well, it took me some time, but I promised that I would post more details about my cool trip to Gettysburg and the Gettysburg National Military Park. On that very ground over the course of three bloody days in July of 1863, Union and Confederate forces slugged it out in what was to become the most pivotal battle of the American Civil War.
The Gettysburg battlefield is an awe-inspiring place where no matter how many times I visit, I always learn or observe something new. The area encompassed by the National Military Park appears much the same today as it did in 1863 (not that I would know personally, but it is evident from photographs of the area taken during the same time period). It is such a peaceful and beautiful area that it always amazes me that it bore witness to some of the most horrific combat this country has ever seen. The Civil War combined more accurate and lethal weaponry with old-style combat and tactics. What this resulted in was a tremendous number of casualties. Add to this the fact that modern medical techniques and the use of antiseptics were still several decades away, and you can imagine how terrible that war must have been. Most people don't realize that more people were killed and wounded in three days at Gettysburg (over 50,000) than during the entire ten years of the Vietnam War!
We stayed at the Doubleday Inn Bed & Breakfast which is located right on the battlefield in the area where much of the heaviest fighting occurred on the first day of the battle. The owners are really very nice people and you really feel at home when you are staying at the Inn. I highly recommend it, and the best part is that the battlefield is literally right outside the front door.
http://www.doubledayinn.com/
- A "tunnel" of autumn foliage looking down Confederate Avenue.
Whenever I visit the battlefield, I am always humbled by the fact that tens of thousands of young men (many of them boys really), died on the very same soil on which I am treading. It is a pretty sobering thought. If you've never been to Gettysburg or any of the multitudes of other preserved Civil War battlefields in this country, I strongly encourage you to plan a visit. You will definitely learn something, and will very possibly discover a whole new appreciation for the history of our great nation.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Two Solid Weeks of Running
Well, as long as I can fit in a "long" run on Sunday (probably about six miles), I will have completed my second consecutive solid week of training. I ran three times (4, 3 and 5 miles) last week, and twice (4 and 4 miles) so far this week. I love this time of year, and I have really been enjoying the Fall season.
I took two sorely needed vacation days from work this week. On Monday, my Dad and I went up to the mountains turkey hunting. We didn't see a single turkey, but that didn't even matter. We had a great day together. The weather was beautiful, and the trees were still a blaze of red and gold. As I sat in the woods drinking coffee from my Thermos while listening to the sounds of squirrels and birds accompany the soft stir of the wind through the falling leaves, an immense peace came over me as I thought, "This is what it's all about." The quiet solitude of the wilderness really calms me and makes me appreciate the natural beauty that is all around us every day and yet goes unnoticed by so many people. We did jump one deer while walking which was pretty exciting. After two straight deer seasons of going home empty, I was starting to wonder if there were any deer left on the mountain. The drive to and from the mountains gave my Dad and I time for some good conversation, and it was nice having breakfast and dinner together.
The weather has been fantastic most of this week. The high has been close to 70 for the past few days. I went for a 4-miler on Thursday and then again this afternoon, and I was comfortable running in shorts and short sleeves. My conditioning is improving slightly, but I still have a long way to go.
I took another day off from work today (Friday) to go small-game hunting with two of my friends in a local county park. None of us got a shot at anything, but again, that didn't really matter too much to any of us. The weather was sunny and warm with a gentle breeze, and it was a fabulous day to be out in the woods. We did kick one deer up while hunting in some underbrush. The cool thing was that the deer (a doe) was half piebald. The front half of the deer was the normal grayish-brown color that they usually are this time of the year as the landscape changes to the darker colors of winter, but the back half of the deer was almost pure white with only a few small, brown spots. Sometimes people confuse these with albinos, but they aren't because even when they are totally white they don't have pink eyes and aren't sensitive to light. Piebald is a recessive gene that causes a lack of pigment in the coat, but it is not a total lack of pigment such as with albinism. I've seen piebald deer before, but they are a pretty uncommon sight overall.
Having some time off has allowed me to put aside the stress from work and compartmentalize it accordingly. I have been talking a lot with my friend, coworker, and fellow Team Leader Jose and we have been discussing our plans for next year including how we plan to change how we manage our area. We have agreed that we need to work harder to manage some of the attitudes and pushback that we get from time to time, and our manager has told us that he will support us "125,000%" so that is encouraging. I am starting to realize that I just can't let it get to me, but that can sometimes be easier said than done. Running, spending time outdoors, and working out are great stress relievers. I need to continue to make them an integral part of my life so that I can keep things in perspective.
I am very happy with how things have progressed the last two weeks, and I will soon turn my thoughts to the spring and the next 26.2 mile quest. All of the buzz about Lance Armstrong running NYC this year, and Dean Karnazes doing 50 marathons in 50 days which culminated at NYC has whet my appetite to whip myself back into the kind of shape necessary to run my 9th marathon. In just the last two weeks of running, I can already tell a difference in my energy and endurance levels. I am starting to feel that familiar hunger building inside my craw. It makes me want to go out there and tear it up.
I took two sorely needed vacation days from work this week. On Monday, my Dad and I went up to the mountains turkey hunting. We didn't see a single turkey, but that didn't even matter. We had a great day together. The weather was beautiful, and the trees were still a blaze of red and gold. As I sat in the woods drinking coffee from my Thermos while listening to the sounds of squirrels and birds accompany the soft stir of the wind through the falling leaves, an immense peace came over me as I thought, "This is what it's all about." The quiet solitude of the wilderness really calms me and makes me appreciate the natural beauty that is all around us every day and yet goes unnoticed by so many people. We did jump one deer while walking which was pretty exciting. After two straight deer seasons of going home empty, I was starting to wonder if there were any deer left on the mountain. The drive to and from the mountains gave my Dad and I time for some good conversation, and it was nice having breakfast and dinner together.
The weather has been fantastic most of this week. The high has been close to 70 for the past few days. I went for a 4-miler on Thursday and then again this afternoon, and I was comfortable running in shorts and short sleeves. My conditioning is improving slightly, but I still have a long way to go.
I took another day off from work today (Friday) to go small-game hunting with two of my friends in a local county park. None of us got a shot at anything, but again, that didn't really matter too much to any of us. The weather was sunny and warm with a gentle breeze, and it was a fabulous day to be out in the woods. We did kick one deer up while hunting in some underbrush. The cool thing was that the deer (a doe) was half piebald. The front half of the deer was the normal grayish-brown color that they usually are this time of the year as the landscape changes to the darker colors of winter, but the back half of the deer was almost pure white with only a few small, brown spots. Sometimes people confuse these with albinos, but they aren't because even when they are totally white they don't have pink eyes and aren't sensitive to light. Piebald is a recessive gene that causes a lack of pigment in the coat, but it is not a total lack of pigment such as with albinism. I've seen piebald deer before, but they are a pretty uncommon sight overall.
Having some time off has allowed me to put aside the stress from work and compartmentalize it accordingly. I have been talking a lot with my friend, coworker, and fellow Team Leader Jose and we have been discussing our plans for next year including how we plan to change how we manage our area. We have agreed that we need to work harder to manage some of the attitudes and pushback that we get from time to time, and our manager has told us that he will support us "125,000%" so that is encouraging. I am starting to realize that I just can't let it get to me, but that can sometimes be easier said than done. Running, spending time outdoors, and working out are great stress relievers. I need to continue to make them an integral part of my life so that I can keep things in perspective.
I am very happy with how things have progressed the last two weeks, and I will soon turn my thoughts to the spring and the next 26.2 mile quest. All of the buzz about Lance Armstrong running NYC this year, and Dean Karnazes doing 50 marathons in 50 days which culminated at NYC has whet my appetite to whip myself back into the kind of shape necessary to run my 9th marathon. In just the last two weeks of running, I can already tell a difference in my energy and endurance levels. I am starting to feel that familiar hunger building inside my craw. It makes me want to go out there and tear it up.
Friday, November 03, 2006
Two Runs, One Week....About Time!
I ran on Monday (4 miles) and Wednesday (3 miles) of this week thus far, making it my first multiple-run week since early August. I must say that I really notice my lack of conditioning on hills and in the middle of runs. I feel a little winded but okay at the beginning, and seem to be able to finish with a slight kick, but that middle segment is always a drag. I have also noticed the oddest thing about all of my old running routes - the hills have grown longer and steeper than they were just six months ago. It can't be me; can it? I get to the top and am thinking, "Wow, that sucked." It makes me both dread the long and painful road back to marathon conditioning, and appreciate just how strong a runner I was less than a year ago. If I was there before, I can get back there again. I just need the commitment to training that I have had in the past.
Work is still busy and hectic, but my outlook has been slightly different, and I am trying not to internalize the stress as I tend to do often. I am very calm and patient with everyone at work, but inside I'm in knots. As a good friend recently reminded me; I need to choose a goal and start working toward it. Good advice as I've given the same to others in the past.
I am planning to run again over the weekend (probably a 5-miler; a long run for me at this point). I also want to make it to the gym as I haven't been there in about three weeks again.
I took a really cool trip to Gettysburg last weekend (more including pictures in a future post), and I am taking two much-needed days off from work next week to go hunting - turkey hunting with Dad on Monday; small game hunting with friends on Friday.
Work is still busy and hectic, but my outlook has been slightly different, and I am trying not to internalize the stress as I tend to do often. I am very calm and patient with everyone at work, but inside I'm in knots. As a good friend recently reminded me; I need to choose a goal and start working toward it. Good advice as I've given the same to others in the past.
I am planning to run again over the weekend (probably a 5-miler; a long run for me at this point). I also want to make it to the gym as I haven't been there in about three weeks again.
I took a really cool trip to Gettysburg last weekend (more including pictures in a future post), and I am taking two much-needed days off from work next week to go hunting - turkey hunting with Dad on Monday; small game hunting with friends on Friday.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
When You're on the Edge
I managed to get a run in tonight despite a trying day at work. Today was one of those days where I felt like all I did was run around putting out fires, and didn't have much to show for all of that running at the end of the day. I am working 1st shift right now (about 20 people in my packaging department), and as the shift supervisor, some days I feel like I am a Romper Room coordinator. It is amazing to me that grown men and women can be so petty and immature. There seems to constantly be some kind of drama going on between employees and conflict between people who work together. Combine those issues with working in a dynamic, fast-paced, and results driven environment and you get a feel for the chaos that I preside over on a daily basis.
I was very tired when I got home, but it was just so damn nice out that I had to go out for a run. It was probably in the upper 60's when I left, and by the time that I returned from running 4 miles, the temperature had probably dropped about 5 degrees or so. It was about 7:10pm when I got back so it was pretty much dark. Tonight's run was very cathartic. I was able to purge the trials of the workday, and get into that training zone where you feel one with the road, and your heart, legs and mind all seem to function as one. I came back feeling very refreshed.
"When you're on the edge and falling off, it's all over." - Three Days Grace from "It's All Over"
I was very tired when I got home, but it was just so damn nice out that I had to go out for a run. It was probably in the upper 60's when I left, and by the time that I returned from running 4 miles, the temperature had probably dropped about 5 degrees or so. It was about 7:10pm when I got back so it was pretty much dark. Tonight's run was very cathartic. I was able to purge the trials of the workday, and get into that training zone where you feel one with the road, and your heart, legs and mind all seem to function as one. I came back feeling very refreshed.
"When you're on the edge and falling off, it's all over." - Three Days Grace from "It's All Over"
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Busy Days, Tired Nights, and Random Musings
Well, I haven't done so well since my last post. I haven't run again or made it back to the gym. I ended up putting in 50+ hours at work last week, and then had to go in on Saturday for five hours as well since we were running production over the weekend. The nice thing is that it's generally pretty quiet at work on a Saturday, and I can get a lot of things done. You know those little nagging things that you always want to get to, but never seem to have time to do. Not that working a lot of hours is an excuse, because I managed to train for all of my marathons while working almost as much. The long hours just make getting back into the habit that much more difficult. I get up for work around 4:30am and generally don't get home from work until around 4:30 or 5:00pm, by which time I am pretty much drained physically and mentally. The days when I drag myself outside to run or to the gym despite my fatigue, I always do feel more energized afterward, but it's just making a recurring habit of it that seems to be difficult.
I ended up going to the mountains on Sunday to shoot my new deer rifle (a Ruger Model 77 MKII 30-06 bolt-action....eh, eh). I've always wanted to own a 30-06, and I finally broke down and bought one about a month ago. I have been itching to shoot it ever since, and boy was it fun. There is nothing quite like the feel of a high-powered rifle kicking back into your shoulder. The bullet exits the muzzle at like 3200 feet per second which is like two times the speed of sound (again eh, eh). It will easily take down any bucks that cross my path next month, in addition to any trees that happen to get in the way. Ha, ha.
Anyhow, it was a gorgeous Fall day outside that started off with a chilly and crisp morning that warmed into the low 60s by the afternoon. The sky was blue, the trees were showing the first signs of color, and I was surrounded by lush Pennsylvania woodlands. As I get older, I realize how much I love being in the mountains: the smell of the clean air, the scent of the pines, the sounds of birds and crickets. More importantly, I got to spend some quality time alone with my Dad. As he and I both get older, I appreciate and treasure this time together more and more. I have come to realize that there is going to come a day when he won't be there anymore, and I want to make every moment we're together count. He is such an amazing person who has so much wisdom to offer, and I can only hope to ever be half the man that he is.
My Dad would do anything for anyone, and never expect a thing in return. He is everything that a person should be, and I admire him more than any other person in the world. I love listening to him tell me who used to live in a certain house, and how they would visit, or what a building was used for thirty years ago, or what the road was like before the bypass was put in, etc, etc. He seems to know every landmark, building and road in Pennsylvania. He is full of so much knowledge, and much of what he knows is lost on my generation. I fear that much of this knowledge will not be passed along so I try to learn all that I can. He grew up on a farm, and he knows so much about farming, hunting, plants, crops, and wildlife. All of those things that with all of our modern technology and urbanization we seem to have stopped caring about and forgotten. The more crazy that life and this world gets, the more that I long for a simpler, more carefree time. I wish to "live simply" as Henry David Thoreau once said. The simple joys in life are truly what make living worthwhile. If all we have in our life is our career, cell phone, internet, and television, then we are truly lost. For the most part, all of these things are devoid of any true value, and we tend to overvalue their importance in our lives.
I apologize for the tirade, but it's these types of thoughts and feelings that I have been having lately as I become more and more disillusioned with our modern world. I have lived in the same small town for the last four years, and in that time have seen no fewer than six new housing developments spring up with more on the way. Along with the houses come the WalMarts, convenience stores, gas stations, and the overcrowding and traffic congestion that go along with them. I watch as the fields, farms, and woodlands that give my homeland its pastoral charm is razed to make way for more overpriced houses that probably won't even be standing in 50 years. I find it very disheartening, and the worst thing is that no one seems to be doing anything about it. It's as if the momentum of "progress" is just too strong to overcome so we ignore it while we drive our 15mpg SUVs and complain about the price of gas. I'm not against building new things, but I feel that it's important to strike a balance between building and preserving, and to build sensibly. As long as the builders keep raking in the cash, and the local governments don't work to curb the behavior, nothing is going to slow down the scourge of overdevelopment and urban sprawl.
I guess that running has always been a way for me to get in touch with the naturalist inside me, and with running currently not playing as prominent a role in my life as it has over the last several years, I guess that my naturalistic side is manifesting itself in other ways. I was just thinking to myself this weekend that at heart I think I long to be a trail runner and spend all of my time running up and down mountains. This would certainly combine my two greatest passions: running and a love of the wilderness. A new path for me perhaps?
I ended up going to the mountains on Sunday to shoot my new deer rifle (a Ruger Model 77 MKII 30-06 bolt-action....eh, eh). I've always wanted to own a 30-06, and I finally broke down and bought one about a month ago. I have been itching to shoot it ever since, and boy was it fun. There is nothing quite like the feel of a high-powered rifle kicking back into your shoulder. The bullet exits the muzzle at like 3200 feet per second which is like two times the speed of sound (again eh, eh). It will easily take down any bucks that cross my path next month, in addition to any trees that happen to get in the way. Ha, ha.
Anyhow, it was a gorgeous Fall day outside that started off with a chilly and crisp morning that warmed into the low 60s by the afternoon. The sky was blue, the trees were showing the first signs of color, and I was surrounded by lush Pennsylvania woodlands. As I get older, I realize how much I love being in the mountains: the smell of the clean air, the scent of the pines, the sounds of birds and crickets. More importantly, I got to spend some quality time alone with my Dad. As he and I both get older, I appreciate and treasure this time together more and more. I have come to realize that there is going to come a day when he won't be there anymore, and I want to make every moment we're together count. He is such an amazing person who has so much wisdom to offer, and I can only hope to ever be half the man that he is.
My Dad would do anything for anyone, and never expect a thing in return. He is everything that a person should be, and I admire him more than any other person in the world. I love listening to him tell me who used to live in a certain house, and how they would visit, or what a building was used for thirty years ago, or what the road was like before the bypass was put in, etc, etc. He seems to know every landmark, building and road in Pennsylvania. He is full of so much knowledge, and much of what he knows is lost on my generation. I fear that much of this knowledge will not be passed along so I try to learn all that I can. He grew up on a farm, and he knows so much about farming, hunting, plants, crops, and wildlife. All of those things that with all of our modern technology and urbanization we seem to have stopped caring about and forgotten. The more crazy that life and this world gets, the more that I long for a simpler, more carefree time. I wish to "live simply" as Henry David Thoreau once said. The simple joys in life are truly what make living worthwhile. If all we have in our life is our career, cell phone, internet, and television, then we are truly lost. For the most part, all of these things are devoid of any true value, and we tend to overvalue their importance in our lives.
I apologize for the tirade, but it's these types of thoughts and feelings that I have been having lately as I become more and more disillusioned with our modern world. I have lived in the same small town for the last four years, and in that time have seen no fewer than six new housing developments spring up with more on the way. Along with the houses come the WalMarts, convenience stores, gas stations, and the overcrowding and traffic congestion that go along with them. I watch as the fields, farms, and woodlands that give my homeland its pastoral charm is razed to make way for more overpriced houses that probably won't even be standing in 50 years. I find it very disheartening, and the worst thing is that no one seems to be doing anything about it. It's as if the momentum of "progress" is just too strong to overcome so we ignore it while we drive our 15mpg SUVs and complain about the price of gas. I'm not against building new things, but I feel that it's important to strike a balance between building and preserving, and to build sensibly. As long as the builders keep raking in the cash, and the local governments don't work to curb the behavior, nothing is going to slow down the scourge of overdevelopment and urban sprawl.
I guess that running has always been a way for me to get in touch with the naturalist inside me, and with running currently not playing as prominent a role in my life as it has over the last several years, I guess that my naturalistic side is manifesting itself in other ways. I was just thinking to myself this weekend that at heart I think I long to be a trail runner and spend all of my time running up and down mountains. This would certainly combine my two greatest passions: running and a love of the wilderness. A new path for me perhaps?
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Back in the Groove
After running two marathon PRs in the Fall of 2005, my performance in the Spring of this year really fell off despite being just as fit if not more so. The generally warmer weather of the spring marathon season doesn't seem to suit me as well as the cooler fall temps. I actually ran my second slowest marathon time out of the eight that I have run in the spring of 2006. This was at the Country Music Marathon in Nashville, TN. I actually ran 15 minutes slower than my inaugural marathon time where I just wanted to finish with little regard to the time that I ran. What can I say; it was just one of those days. The only time that I've run slower was a spring marathon in 2005 where it was warm and humid, and I was running with a slight overuse injury that had pretty much prevented me from training the final two weeks.
This subpar performance combined with increasing stress/time spent at work and just general mental burnout really took a toll on my motivation. I was three weeks into training for the Richmond Marathon in November when I realized that my heart just wasn't into it. I scrapped the marathon training and told myself that I would concentrate on a local half-marathon and some other shorter races in the fall, but I just couldn't seem to stay on track and stick to any training program. What it all amounts to is that I haven't run more than once a week since the end of July, and I haven't run a single race since mid-July when I ran a local 5-miler.
This week I finally decided to get off the snide and make a concerted effort to get back to running and weight training. I have gained roughly eight pounds or so since the end of July. I'm only about 5' 8", so eight pounds is pretty noticeable on me. All of my clothes still fit, but needless to say, there are a few pairs of pants that are a little more snug than they used to be. I think that is what finally put me over the edge -- I'm not going up a waist size.
So, as my first foray back into the world of the fit and out of the realm of the fat, lazy slob I went for an easy 4-miler last night. It was warm yesterday (close to 80 degrees), but once the sun started to drop, the temperature went right along with it. By early evening the air was cool and comfortable so it was a perfect night for a run. I decided not to wear my HR monitor on my runs for a while as my elevated HR will do nothing but taunt me (heh, heh, you used to be in shape -- loser). I was actually pleasantly surprised by how much overall conditioning that I've retained. The endurance certainly isn't there, but I am still able to run 4 miles at the same pace as when I was marathon training. My legs did start to feel slightly fatigued, but they really aren't all that sore today.
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in almost two months. I must admit that it felt good to throw a little iron around. They got some nice new equipment (Hammer Strength) at the gym which I enjoyed beating around a little today. Time away from the gym has never really bothered me that much. I am stocky and pretty solidly built so I tend to pack on muscle pretty quickly. Again, I was surprised by how much strength I had retained. Some of the raw power was gone, but I was still able to use a respectable amount of weight for all of the exercises that I performed.
So it's been two consecutive days of working out (running and then weight training). Tomorrow I am planning to go for another run, and then I actually might play dek hockey on Thursday evening. I played hockey for about twelve years in high school/college/after college but gave it up about six years ago. I recently picked up the stick again, but I don't have any plans to get too serious about it. The chance of physical disfigurement is just too great (I'm already plenty ugly thank you), and it's not like I'm getting paid to sacrifice my body. A coworker plays on a team that is short of guys so he put me on the team and told me to show up when I can. I told him that I won't make every game as I'm just not that into it.
Anyway, I must admit that it feels good to be back in the groove. Hopefully, I can keep the momentum going.
This subpar performance combined with increasing stress/time spent at work and just general mental burnout really took a toll on my motivation. I was three weeks into training for the Richmond Marathon in November when I realized that my heart just wasn't into it. I scrapped the marathon training and told myself that I would concentrate on a local half-marathon and some other shorter races in the fall, but I just couldn't seem to stay on track and stick to any training program. What it all amounts to is that I haven't run more than once a week since the end of July, and I haven't run a single race since mid-July when I ran a local 5-miler.
This week I finally decided to get off the snide and make a concerted effort to get back to running and weight training. I have gained roughly eight pounds or so since the end of July. I'm only about 5' 8", so eight pounds is pretty noticeable on me. All of my clothes still fit, but needless to say, there are a few pairs of pants that are a little more snug than they used to be. I think that is what finally put me over the edge -- I'm not going up a waist size.
So, as my first foray back into the world of the fit and out of the realm of the fat, lazy slob I went for an easy 4-miler last night. It was warm yesterday (close to 80 degrees), but once the sun started to drop, the temperature went right along with it. By early evening the air was cool and comfortable so it was a perfect night for a run. I decided not to wear my HR monitor on my runs for a while as my elevated HR will do nothing but taunt me (heh, heh, you used to be in shape -- loser). I was actually pleasantly surprised by how much overall conditioning that I've retained. The endurance certainly isn't there, but I am still able to run 4 miles at the same pace as when I was marathon training. My legs did start to feel slightly fatigued, but they really aren't all that sore today.
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in almost two months. I must admit that it felt good to throw a little iron around. They got some nice new equipment (Hammer Strength) at the gym which I enjoyed beating around a little today. Time away from the gym has never really bothered me that much. I am stocky and pretty solidly built so I tend to pack on muscle pretty quickly. Again, I was surprised by how much strength I had retained. Some of the raw power was gone, but I was still able to use a respectable amount of weight for all of the exercises that I performed.
So it's been two consecutive days of working out (running and then weight training). Tomorrow I am planning to go for another run, and then I actually might play dek hockey on Thursday evening. I played hockey for about twelve years in high school/college/after college but gave it up about six years ago. I recently picked up the stick again, but I don't have any plans to get too serious about it. The chance of physical disfigurement is just too great (I'm already plenty ugly thank you), and it's not like I'm getting paid to sacrifice my body. A coworker plays on a team that is short of guys so he put me on the team and told me to show up when I can. I told him that I won't make every game as I'm just not that into it.
Anyway, I must admit that it feels good to be back in the groove. Hopefully, I can keep the momentum going.
Monday, October 09, 2006
Prologue
Having fun running my marathon PR in Harrisburg - November 2005It seems like having a blog is the "in" thing to do these days, but that isn't the reason why I have decided to start my own. I am generally not the type of person to do things just because everyone else thinks it's cool. Those days of blind conformity are over for me. No, the reason that I have chosen to venture down this new path is that I feel like I may be reaching a turning point in my life and I felt that this was a novel way to record my thoughts and feelings along the way.
I have reached a sort of crossroads in life's journey, and I'm not exactly sure which path that I want to take. In fact, I'm not really clear as to which paths are available to me at this point. I feel that we generally live our lives in phases or eras and that I may be reaching the end of one era and the beginning of another. I have been thinking a lot about where I am and where I am headed. I just feel like there is so much left for me to do and accomplish in life, and meanwhile life is quickly passing me by while I am held hostage by the daily grind.
These thoughts and feelings are what compelled me to start this blog. We only get one chance on this massive, spinning rock. I am not content to just sit idly by and watch the precious gift of my time on Earth slip by uneventfully. I only have until the end of my days to build the legacy that I will leave behind forever. My time here is short and the clock is ticking. I intend to make my mark. This blog will chronicle my quest.
"It's easy to say I can. I want to be able to say I did."
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